Nemesis

Moms: Have you ever had days (or weeks, months, etc.) where you just feel like a failure?  Other moms seem to have it together.  Their kids are more advanced in certain areas.  Why is that 18 month old speaking in entire sentences?  Their homes are spotless even with a tiny tot running around.  Shouldn't there be a finger print on something?  Oh and they cook dinner, feed their children, and clean up in time for a Norman Rockwell painting by the fireplace before bed.  Why is there no food on the floor, no toddler refusing to eat, and the dog isn't eating the cat's food?  Something is wrong!

Or maybe something is wrong with the expectations I place on myself.  Something about being Type A and OCD lends one to a lifetime of uphill battles trying to attain perfection.  Apparently, it's not possible when it comes to parenting.  BUMMER!

I'm trying to learn to be gracious with myself.  Stop comparing (most of what you see/hear is only what the other individual is proud of anyway).  Bask in the small victories (veggies for dinner without a riot?  SCORE!).  Live in the moment...be it good or bad.

I have been (and honestly will probably continue) worrying about Emory.  I read to him all the time in hopes that his language skills will improve.  I talk to him about everything we do.  Praying that something will sink in and click.  I want him to have fun learning, but I feel pressure to do it better or practice more often or give lessons with more enthusiasm.  

The fact is that our son has his own personality.  He's rambunctious at times, he's all boy, and he is curious.  He's also very reserved, overly-cautious, and not a talker (he'll sign for you though).  So I've been focusing on the fun part of learning and developing during our play sessions.  

He LOVES puzzles.  For months he's been playing with all of his Melissa & Doug chunky puzzles, but the favorite (BY FAR) is the vehicle one.  No surprise since Emory seems to believe that everything goes "vroom vroom."  He's never gotten it right all by himself.  Much to my dismay, I sit back and watch as he stumbles on the same piece every single time.  It's his nemesis, THE SAILBOAT.

You can tell from the chipping paint that this puzzle has been through the ringer.

Today, he did it!  I sent Phillip a text message telling him that I couldn't be any prouder had my child discovered the cure for cancer (maybe a bit of an exaggeration).  You see, Phillip is the anti-me.  He knows that I fret over things I can't control (like puzzle pieces that won't cooperate, language that is slow to develop, or tantrums that spawn from nowhere).  Being the supportive husband that he is, Phillip rejoiced in Emory's victory.  

It's been a week of ups and downs.  Physically, I am d.o.w.n. and feeling pretty useless as a wife and mama.  Mentally, I am exhausted from the growing "to do before Baby Boy #2 arrives" list in my head.  Emotionally, well...I'm pregnant (so I'm all over the board).  However, I am elated that today a small sailboat fit perfectly into it's cozy home in a puzzle.  It's the little things in life that make all the difference.  

 Kristin